Most golfers know and understand that slow play is bad for the game of golf. That is a fact.

In some instances, a rage fills some players when faced with it that would rival Bill Bixby. And in others, players seem to pawn it off as part of the game and while annoying perhaps, keep pretty much to themselves about the pace of their partner or competitors play.

Recently during one of golf’s biggest stages, The Open Championship, J.B. Holmes was particularly slow and was called out by Brooks Keopka shortly after the round. Now, this isn’t the equivalent of you complaining to your pals inside the bar after the round that Jared was the slowest player on the planet, but he was a great guy and was just trying to get better.


This was straight fire directed right at a professional athlete from another professional athlete. Which happens all the time as we know. But, when it is done within the gentleman’s game of golf, well that raises some eyebrows and has become a hot topic around course clubhouses.

Here is the quote from Brooks.

“When it’s your turn to hit, your glove is not on, then you start thinking about it. That’s where the problem lies. It’s not that he takes that long. He doesn’t do anything until it’s his turn.” – Brooks Koepka

Let’s just look at one example of the madness of Holmes on the green earlier this year.


This is where the debate gets interesting because much like blackjack in a casino, the table expects you to play by the book, do the right things, and not mess it up for everybody else. Yet, it is your money you are gambling with and you can literally do whatever you want.

You want to hit a 19 and hope for that 2? Well, then you go right ahead.

Do you want to split 5’s and then double down on the split like a crazed idiot? Go ahead. To hell with everybody else, this is your game and your money and you will play however you want.

That is the argument that most grinders will give you. And they are totally within their rights as a human being to do that but as we all know, actions create reactions and typically the reaction to a slow player is not patience and understanding. It is rage.

For the record, here are five things we find less annoying to wait on than a slow golfer:

  1. Infant child to go to sleep in the middle of a world-class tantrum
  2. The construction worker in a work zone to change the sign from stop to slow
  3. A continuously delayed flight
  4. Anything at the BMV
  5. Somebody leaving a great parking space, and they are texting everybody they know (apparently).

There is apparently a #don’tcare movement happening within golf now. People seem to be ambivalent to the fact that slow play is ruining golf, rounds, and lives. I guess we will all just wait for golf to institute a shot clock.

Which come to think about it, we will add as number 6 in our list of things less annoying to wait on than a slow golfer.