Golf is rife with manageable, and sometimes unmanageable elements. The rain, wind, conditions of the greens, the group playing ahead are unmanageable but crafting the perfect foursome is in your control. Man, can all four of them really be that bad, you ask?
On any Friday at 3 pm in offices across the world, phones buzz with words on the screen – “Spot open, want to play?” The initial reaction is met with the same excitement as always and an instant yes is typed back. Then a brief pause before you hit send and you ask yourself “what kind of day you want?”
Do you want the day spent with Tommy Talksalot, Chet the Cheater, Bill the slow-moving grandpa, or Chase the too cool for school newbie?
Quick reply with the simple question back, “Who’s playing?”
THE PERFECT FOURSOME
If the answer is any of these characters, your day is merely tolerable or maybe completely ruined. But when you manage the one manageable element, the “one thing” that makes your day, always try to find the right players to join you at tee time. This blend is like getting the remaining perfect beers out of your fridge to accompany you en route to a party.
Design a foursome as specific and predictable as the beers you choose, then drink it up from tee to green. Meet the perfectly blended foursome.
This foursome starts with the witty, clever, sarcastic person that plays well but knows it’s a game – the IPA. Not truly a pompous ass by nature, but has developed the pure talent and love of the game and is just enough punch to give your round a jolt of excitement.
Add that player who keeps you on your toes as a golfer, giving the perfect tip on the line, advice on the angle of your approach and is always consistent – Pilsner. You obviously call him the ass who always makes the tough putt along with any other worthy expletive. Don’t worry, that’s the best part of his day. He likes to fly under the radar as a staple player, like your pilsner.
Now, include the player that makes your bad day look great. This part of the fourth is more nonsense than golf sense and this player is there just to get out of the house and because he likes being part of the guys – a Belgium Wit.
IT’S OK TO TAKE A PASS
Without crafting the perfect golf foursome, it’s truly possible to have the good walk spoiled by that one player who leaves no room for anyone else’s words, wit or wisdom. The player that is pissed because for 15-holes because they had a rough start. Or the player that is more interested in drinking his body weight than hitting any shot.
So when the answer to the question, “Who’s playing?” is anybody other than those three, let them know you’re busy.
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